As I tidied the flat the other day after lunch, I listened to a rousing audio training with one of the world’s top coaches.

Totally my jam.

And there was a Q&A at the end of the training.

After the first question, the coach paused for a second…

And then replied “I don’t know”.

As I stacked the dishwasher, I remember thinking this was odd. 

After all, he’ll have been asked this question – and similar questions – for decades.

But a few seconds later, he gave an answer.  And the questioner responded:  “Thank you. That helps me so much”.

A couple of minutes later the same thing happened.  A question was asked and the coach replied “I don’t know”.

And just like before, he went on to give a deep and heartfelt answer.

For the next 45 minutes, this happened 5 or 6 times (can’t remember exactly how many).

And by the end, as I puffed up the cushions, I was scratching my head.

How can the coach say he doesn’t know and then go on to give such meaningful answers?

And why is he ADMITTING to the fact that he doesn’t know the answers to a bunch of standard questions?

No-one does this.

If a teacher says “I don’t know” to an eager pupil’s question, it could lead to disengaged pupils or a lack of confidence in the teacher.

And in the workplace it could be worse.

Imagine a corporate banker confessing “I don’t know” to a client’s question about their new strategy.  Or giving a feeble “I don’t know” to an interview question.

Responses like these could be career suicide.

So it’s par for the course that our years at school and work beef up the idea that we need to have ready-made answers.

And this idea hides a fundamental truth.

Which is this:

Life is more fun, more rewarding and more fulfilling when we DON’T have ready-made answers.

Why?

Because we look beyond what we think we know to find new, different and more meaningful answers. 

Our perspective broadens.  Our creativity flourishes.  And a whole new world of possibilities emerge.

“I don’t know” becomes the gateway to a deeper knowing.

And I think this is why the coach used this phrase so often.

Not only was he unfazed with not knowing…

But he understood that his wisdom lay in not knowing.  And he was discovering the right answer in each moment, for each moment.

So if your goal is to ace an exam, impress your boss or get a promotion at work, having ready-made answers is important.  Maybe even crucial. 

But if your goal is to live an enthralling, rich and meaningful life, it's not.  In fact, having the answers will only get in your way.

So before I wrap up, let me ask you this:

How often do you already know the answer, feel like you should, or pretend that you do?  And what would life be like if you spent more time in the unknown? 

That’s all for now.

Have a wonderful weekend.

- Tom

p.s. Whenever you're ready, here are the ways you can connect with me