“Human beings are the only animals who shit in their own nest to get themselves to move out” 

I’ve been pondering this quote from a Jesuit priest recently.

And I wonder:

Did I leave my job when things got too bad?  When the 14 hour days became too draining, and the daily grind of the calls, emails and meetings became too dull & dopey?

Or did I somehow make things bad in order to leave my job?  Was it me who made the hours longer, the work feel meaningless and the stress unbearable?  Even if I didn’t realise I was doing it.

Seems like a strange question to ask.

After all, why make things worse than they need to be?

Well, I think there’s actually a very good reason why:

Engineering a terrible situation means no-one can blame you when you take action.

See, I think there’s an unwritten rule which says there needs to be convincing and undeniable reasons which everyone can see to make big changes in life.

That way, other people will say “Fair enough.  You tried everything you could”.  Or “Okey dokey.  I understand why you're doing that”.

It’s a form of external validation.  

And humans long for it.

But if you’d rather avoid the time, energy and worry of trying to convince other people and making sure everyone is onboard with whatever you’re doing, you can take a shortcut.

And the shortcut is very simple:

Knowing you want something (or don’t want something) is enough.

There doesn’t need to be a big, convincing, justifiable reason which everyone can see.

Your desire itself can be the reason.  Even if you can’t clearly articulate that desire.

And look.  Caring what other people think is a very human reaction.  And I’m certainly not telling you not to care.  Or telling you what to do, or what not to do.

But I am claiming that you don't need to have your life choices rubber-stamped by an approval committee if you don’t want to.

You can do whatever you want to do for no other reason than wanting to do it or feeling like you want to do it.  And still be a thoughtful and caring person.

Not sure what you want to do?

Or sure, but worried what other people will think?

I can help with these.

If you’d like support:

https://calendly.com/followingfulfilment

The link will take you to a booking form for a free 45 minute coaching call with me.

The call is a chance to explore whatever challenge you’re facing.  

And I know you’ll come away from the call with a pep in your step, raring to go.

That’s all for today. 

Have a great weekend.

 - Tom