A long time ago, when I was living back home with Mum & Dad, I had the daily displeasure of riding the rush hour tube into work every day.

And the morning trains were so busy that I used a little trick straight from the “life advice” handbook of Dad, which was to jump on a train on the opposite platform, travel backwards away from the office until the platforms became empty enough that I could hop off, switch platform, board a train heading the other way, and grab a seat.

It worked like a charm.

I became one of those smug, annoying people gazing at everyone else jostling for position and sweltering like sardines in a can.  I could often see the sweat patches on guys’ shirts growing increasingly visible, and in some cases drops of sweat actually trickling down people’s noses onto the coat or shirt of another unsuspecting commuter.

This is why I did my best to grab a seat.

Sometimes it would even turn ugly with much muttering and sighing as a businessman stepped on a lady’s toe, or a young buck squeezed into a space which someone thought they had all to themselves.

Such were the joys of rush hour.

So am I suggesting everyone travel backwards to travel forwards?  Is this what the subject line refers to?

Not on your nelly!

Instead, take a look at this little extract I found in a book called The Things You Can Only See When You Slow Down by Haemin Sunim:

I squeeze myself into the subway car.  People are crowded all around me. 

I can either get annoyed, or think it’s fun that I don’t have to grab a handrail. 

People react differently to the same situation. 

If we look more closely, we see it’s not the situation that is troubling us, but our perspective on it.

Another way of saying this is that two people can have different thoughts about the same situation.  And that it’s these thoughts (or how seriously someone treats these thoughts) which can change someone’s whole experience of that situation.

It’s a great example of how it’s not events which dictate our experience or feelings of life. 

If two people on a packed train can experience their journey in completely different ways, then it can’t be the train journey which is inherently the cause of annoyance.

And it can’t be that situations or events have feelings magically attached to them.

It has to be how we see that situation.  It has to be our thoughts.

And to my mind, this is really good news.

Because when we notice that we’re feeling stressed or annoyed (like on a sweaty tube train), it’s a clue that we might simply be having a stressful thought.  Even if we can’t pin down that specific thought.

And knowing it’s my thoughts or mindset which is causing my stress, rather than the situation or event, has made it easier for me to take these feelings less seriously.

After all, there’s nothing inherently stressful or meaningful about having thoughts. 

They’re fluid, temporary and ever-changing...  

And simply a natural part of life.

That’s all for now. 

 - Tom