I’ve got an offer for you today.

More on that in a moment.

But first, here’s what marketing manager Beth posted on LinkedIn after a coaching session with me:

I recently had an insightful conversation with Tom Grundy, and it made me realise that perhaps there is another way to look at presentness.

For me, I believed that ‘being present’ needed practice, typically me, I saw it as something which I could improve about myself 🙈

But what if it isn't something we need just to practice often in order to be 'better' at?

What if, instead, we need to remove the obstacles in our way to presentness rather than trying to push through them?

This can be physical 'noise'.

🤳🏼 Our phone notifications

Or our mental noise

😟 Self-doubt, anxiousness, and worry.

For me, this approach changed the dialogue; presentness is no longer something on my list to improve, to berate myself for when I think I haven't been doing it enough.

But something to be more aware of, acknowledging the situations where it comes easier and how to manifest those scenarios in other areas of my life.

I think this still requires practice, but at least now, I am taking the pressure off. ☯

I love Beth’s insight here.

And she’s bang on the money.

Most people get that living in the moment is where the magic lies.  And that being present can help to reduce stress, increase happiness and lead to a greater appreciation for life.

But adding “being present” to your checklist of activities is a sure-fire way to be less present, not more.

You could say getting present is similar to decluttering a room. 

If you’re adding more actions, goals or practices to try to be more present, it’s like trying to declutter your room by adding shelves, filing cabinets and three John Lewis decorative wicker baskets.

You might THINK you’re de-cluttering…

And your room might even look tidier…

But all you’ve done is add more stuff.  You haven’t de-cluttered at all.

And when it comes to our own thinking – and being present – it’s the same.  People battle & strive to reach a place which, by its very nature, represents the opposite of battling and striving.

Ironic, no?

It’s completely innocent of course.  We somehow think that more practising and striving will help.

But it’s not the answer. 

The answer is doing less, not more.

Which takes me to the offer I mentioned at the top of the email.

I’m offering to send you a short exercise.  I like to think of this exercise as an experiment and exploration wrapped into one.

You can do it anywhere, any time.

The exercise is for anyone who would like to be more present, without thinking of presence as something to do but as something which can be found.

The exercise is designed – in a couple of short steps – to give you a glimpse into what being present really feels like.  On the basis that once you’ve experienced presence for yourself, the easier it will be to find it again.

If you’d like me to send you the exercise, hit reply.  And in a sentence either let me know a time when you could really feel that sense of presence for yourself, or a time when you felt completely un-present and distracted.  Up to you which one.

In return, I’ll write back with the exercise (and I'll tell you where I got it from).

That’s all for today.

- Tom