A few months back, I spent a Saturday morning volunteering at my old school’s Career Fair.

I’d been invited to share my thoughts about my 13 year banking career and talk about age-old questions like how to find the right balance between success & fulfilment at work.

As the morning rolled on and I chinwagged with more & more people, I started to notice something strange.

It wasn’t the students asking most of the questions.  It was their parents!

I was getting questions like: 

Jimmy wants to be a doctor.  Should he take double maths?

What’s the best way to get into a law career?

Should my son apply for every banking graduate scheme?  Or focus on investment banking schemes?

I thought this was intriguing. 

It wasn’t just that the parents were asking questions.  It was more that the parents had assumed exactly what career paths their little darlings would take.

Clearly the adults thought they knew best.

But I have to say:

I’m not so sure about that.  I don’t think adults always do know best. 

Particularly if "knowing best" means following the same rules, guidelines and protocols that everyone else is following, taking life overly seriously, worrying about what might happen and living for yesterday & tomorrow instead of today.

As it so often does.

None of this strikes me as “knowing best”.

Especially when you consider the other side of the coin:

Living life with a smile on your face, being curious, present and seeing the wonder in life, playing, frolicking, having fun, going with the flow, following your instincts and knowing no other way. 

Children seem to be in touch with all of this. 

Much more than adults.

You can see this clearly in younger children.  They know which toy they want to play with, what snack they want to eat (usually Haribo Starmix) and they make decisions like there’s no decision to make.

It’s all instinct. It’s all natural.

This is why I don’t think adults always know best.  I think they’ve lost touch with this instinct.

Don’t get me wrong – that instinct is still there.

But it becomes harder to find as we grow up.  It gets crowded out by internal and external noise.

And even when we do notice it, we push it to one side. 

Perhaps we don’t think it’s helpful or useful.  It’s not the sensible, responsible approach.

Perhaps it’s even (dare I say it) too childish.

My assertion?

This instinct – this open, curious, playful, present, connected and childish instinct – isn’t just where the best of life takes place.

It is life.

And the more you live your life from this place, the easier it becomes to make decisions, solve problems and find clarity & direction about whatever it is you’re seeking.

It’s one of the reasons my coaching is free of frameworks, exercises and checklists.

My aim is to help my coachees get out of their head.  Not to encourage even more rational, logical and analytical thinking.

Thinking like this is far too adultish!

If you have an instinct to find out more about coaching:

https://waitinglist.followingfulfilment.com

 - Tom