Lauren and I were watching Celebrity Gogglebox a few days ago.

During an ad break, a car ad came on.

The car was a beautiful deep crimson red.  It glided majestically along a road hugging a sunlit shoreline.  On one side of the road were lush trees and greenery.  On the other side, the waves splashed gently under the hot, beating sun. 

The wheels of the car spun with a poise, elegance and pizazz.

Then the ad cut to the inside of the car, where a good-looking couple were staring at each other wistfully.  The driver turned to face the road, adjusted his sleek sunglasses and with a confident smile, put his foot on the pedal.

The car zoomed into the distance with all the grace of a gazelle.

And as the ad finished up, I was left in no doubt that if I bought this car, I’d also experience the beauty, elegance, sophistication, style, comfort and prestige which were dripping throughout the ad.

Advertisers are experts at this.

“Buy this product” their enticing adverts say… 

“And you can have all this too”.

But I hate to break it to you dear reader.

It’s all a ruse!

I don’t mean a ruse to part you from your hard earnt wonga.  What you spend your money on is up to you.

The ruse is more implicit.

It’s a ruse which says that the way to feel good is by buying stuff or owning stuff.

And I have to say…

I don’t think this is true.

I could point to how the satisfaction of buying something always seems to wear off quickly.  Or how physical clutter can create emotional clutter.  Or the idea that true happiness comes from experiences and relationships. 

But actually, I’m not saying any of these.

And that’s because all these imply that feeling good is still based on what happens in the outside world.

And I don’t think it is.

We can all feel good in any moment, regardless of the situation we’re in.

We can feel relaxed when we’re stuck in traffic, calm when we’re queueing at Tesco, overjoyed when we get caught in the rain, curious when we lose our keys, cheerful when we need to work late unexpectedly, peaceful when we feel unwell or content when we get a huge tax bill in the post.

If none of these hit home, perhaps you can think of your own examples.

Examples where you've noticed your happiness is independent of what you buy, own, do or face.

To be clear:

I’m not dismissing anyone’s struggles, I’m not promoting some sort of toxic positivity and I’m not trying to set unrealistic expectations.

And that’s because I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with not feeling happy.  I’m also not saying anyone should do, feel, or think anything.

That’s up to you.

All I’m saying is that if you do want to feel more happy more often, it’s possible, right now in this very moment.

You don’t need to buy a stylish new car to find it.

You just need to know where to look.

If you’d like to get started:

https://waitinglist.followingfulfilment.com

That’s all for today.

 - Tom