The first thing to expect is daily sessions which start at 7am.

(NOT what I was expecting!)

What else to expect?

Well, Rupert kicked off this morning’s session with a warning:

Let go of any expectations you have. Let go of the expectation that this session will bring you peace. Let go of the expectation that I’ll say something profound. Let go of the expectation that you’ll become enlightened.

If you've come into this retreat with expectations you will, by definition, leave disappointed.

The Spiralizer went on to say:

Imagine a friend drives you home. As you walk into your house, you see your favourite painting is missing from the wall. Your attention is immediately taken by the space where the painting was. 

Perhaps you feel surprised. Maybe you feel shocked. You might even feel panicked.

But a friend who has never been to your house won’t feel this way, even though you’ve both walked into the same room. 

Your expectations have caused your upset. It’s all in your mind.

The first thought that came up when I heard this was how often someone asks me “how did that compare to your expectations Tom?” and my answer is “actually, I had very few expectations”.

For instance, I'm not expecting my new book to be a smash hit, a total flop or anything in between. 

Before Baby Grundy came on the scene, I’d heard all the stories about the brutal lack of sleep and how I could wave goodbye to “me time”. But I genuinely had no expectations here either. I took the view “whatever will be will be…”

I also had no expectations for this retreat. I wasn’t expecting to be blissed out by breakfast or to be floating three inches off the floor by dinner.

It hasn’t always been this way for me though. Not by a long stretch.

But a year or so ago, something shifted.

Perhaps I’ve eased up on my expectations because I’ve seen how bad I am at predicting the future. 

And even though once upon a time I might’ve viewed a lack of expectation as denial or a signal that I'm not emotionally engaged, I don’t think that's true any more.

Letting go of expectations doesn’t mean we’re not invested or that we don’t care.

It just means being open to whatever is going on rather than what we think should be going on.

So what to expect from a Rupert Spira retreat?

Well, I’m expecting lunch at 12.30.

But apart from that, I wonder if the whole point is not to expect anything and to sit with what is instead. 

Back tomorrow with more.